My Personal Hell, D. Richardson [ebook reader browser txt] 📗

something when they didn’t know what they had done.

Instead he just nodded a dismissal and took his seat at the table. Tom showed an obvious dislike of the snub and hesitated upon leaving. He wanted to stay to see his handy work carried out. Even hesitating as long as he was, was dangerous and could be considered disobeying a direct order from his alpha. So he did the only thing he could, and turned and left.

I sat next to Ailith. Partly because when she was told that she was going to be isolated and locked away was likely to upset her. But mostly because I liked being close to her. Asher took the seat on her other side and I repressed the growl that wanted to leak out.

An hour later she sat rock still in her chair. Her spine was straight and her eyes never left the table. Honestly, to look at her she seemed perfectly calm. Well, if you consider looking emotionless calm.

“So you’re telling me that at any point I could literally turn into a wolf. And that I’m going to go insane and attack any one that I come across?”

“There’s no guarantee that you’ll lose your sanity,” Becca said quickly. But Ailith shook her head.

“But your worried that I will. That’s why you’re going to lock me in my room…until further notice,” She said the last bit softly, while speaking Drake’s exact words from a few minutes ago. He blanched in response. The guilt came off him in waves, and I begged him with my eyes to reconsider. To just give her a chance to prove that she’s perfectly fine. But he wouldn’t even look at me.

“What about Kadi and Lori?”

“They’ll be taken care of. They are perfectly safe with us, no harm will come to them. I give you my word as an alpha.”

“Yes, while I’m sure that means something that I don’t yet know about, I was asking what you plan on telling them?” That gave them all pause, and it infuriated me.

Could they not see how much those girls meant to her? How they depended on her, even when they couldn’t see her. Sure they did things without her, but that’s only because they’re trying to figure out how to be normal. They always come back to her, and she is always there.

“We’ll think of something,” Drake answered after a couple moments of silence. She nodded and stood. As she made her way out of the room she paused. She barely turned her head, but kept her back to the room.

“What about school?” Her voice was so low when she asked. It was almost like she was afraid of the answer. Drake sighed.

“We’ll make sure the girls go, but…” He trailed off and the answer was given with silence. She nodded in understanding, and I could see her wilt. Her shoulders dropped and she lowered her head just enough for me to notice.

She left quickly and I listened as she took the stairs. I stared at the table for a couple of minutes, then stood quickly. She shouldn’t be alone, not after receiving yet another disappointment from life. I almost made it to the door, but Drake stopped me.

“Sadler…” I turned to look at him. If he forbid me to see her I wouldn’t have a choice. I couldn’t help her if I was not allowed on the territory. But when he met my eyes he averted his, and I took the opportunity.

I took the stairs two at a time. There was a heavy lock on the front of her door. I had no idea when they had installed it, but it was there and it served as a shock of ice down my spine. She finally escaped one prison only to be put in another.

I knocked but heard no answer. I knew she was inside, when I focused I could hear her heartbeat. I opened the door slowly, giving her plenty of time to tell me to leave. But she didn’t so I entered closing the door softly behind me.

She stood in the middle of the room, staring at the sliding glass door that led to her balcony. It only took me a second to see why she had stopped. There was a chain secured to the door. It would only open about three inches.

“You knew didn’t you? You knew all along that this was going to happen. That’s why you were spending so much time with me. Why you insisted on going everywhere I did. You were ordered to,” She spoke with her back to me. The betrayal I heard in her voice cut me like knives. But I wouldn’t lie to her, instead I sighed.

“Yes, I knew. I’ve known for about a week. I wanted to tell you, I tried to change his mind, I swear.”

“Even after I told you what going to school meant to me. And you knew I wasn’t even going to get to go. You let me have hope, knowing that it would be crushed.” I reached up to touch her shoulder, but she stiffened so I let it drop to my side.

“I knew, I’m so sorry, but I wasn’t allowed to say anything. And yes, at first I hung around you because I was ordered to, but that’s not why I stayed. You became a friend. I never wanted any of this to happen.” She took a deep breath, but never looked at me. Instead she drew her shoulders back and lifted her head high.

“Please leave, I need some time alone.” I nodded though she wouldn’t have seen it. After I had closed the door between us I stared at the lock. I turned and went down the stairs slowly. They wanted her locked away, but I would be damned if I was going to be the one to turn the key.

Chapter 11

Ailith

 

 

 

The first few days were actually kind of peaceful. The locks and chain were disheartening, but if I ignored them, I could just pretend like I was spending time in my room. I soaked in my tub and stretched out on my bed. I still had some pilfered books, so I spent a good deal of time reading. I didn’t have to worry about Kadi and Lori, I knew they were well cared for.

But then the Jacuzzi lost it’s appeal, and I ran out of books. I had too much pent up energy so I would spend hours just walking in circles in my room. The locks and chain became impossible to ignore, and I missed the girls. If I focused I could hear them, even smell them, but the appeal they held was just too much of a temptation. So I had to ignore the rest of the house instead.

I kept the sliding door open as far as it would go, if only to let in some fresh air. They would send one of the men I hadn’t actually met to give me food, and retrieve my empty plates. But then the food lost it’s taste. It still looked good, but I had no desire for it. It started to get to where two out of the three meals they delivered went back untouched.

Sadler never came back. I was starting to regret sending him away. I was just too upset at the time to let him stay. But now I ached for company, someone that would actually talk to me, instead of acting like I was a prisoner.

My wolf was almost nothing more than an internal growling and whining. She was taking our confinement harder than I was. The situation was depressing enough that I didn’t even spare the time to be freaked out that I had an internal wolf. Everything had happened so quickly, from finding out to when I heard the lock slide shut. It was almost instant acceptance born from having no other choice.

Until finally all I could do was sit in front of the crack in the glass door, and stare out. I couldn’t even see the yard from where I was. All I could see was sky and the metal railing that guarded the edge of the balcony. And it had only been a week since the door closed. At one point I looked at my calendar. It was the first day of school and I listened as the rest of the house got ready to go. And then the silence after they were gone.

I was beginning to wonder if this was the start of my insanity. This desolation and depression. I felt like I was in a cage, although a pretty one. A cage that gave the semblance of comfort.

Then someone knocked on the door. The ones that brought food never knocked. They simply opened the door and put a tray on the floor. I didn’t bother answering, after all, the lock was on the other side of the door. Anyone that wanted to come in would regardless of what I said. I didn’t bother to look when the door opened.

“Hey,” I turned at the sound of his voice. Sadler stood there with a tray of food. He must have volunteered to bring me my meal.

“Hey,” I answered and turned back to staring out the door.

“The guys told me that you haven’t been eating much in the last couple of days.” I shrugged.

“Not that hungry. I’m surprised they bothered to even mention it.” His brows furrowed.

“They’re starting to worry about you.” I snorted.

“Well, you can tell them I haven’t gone crazy yet.” He shook his head.

“That’s not what I meant. They don’t hold any ill will towards you, Ailith. They volunteer to bring you food, they aren’t ordered to.” I shrugged. There really wasn’t anything for me to say, it’s not like they ever show me any concern when they’re here. He sighed.

“Is there anything I can get you? Anything you need?” I looked over at him. He sat perched on my bed, but he was at the very edge and his hands clenched the mattress. He looked so tense and eager to help. So I decided to ask for something he couldn’t give me.

“Got any cigarettes?” His eyes widened in surprise, but to my surprise, he pulled an open pack out of his pocket and tossed it to me. I caught it easily and dug my own lighter out of my pocket.

It was a silver Zippo, and had a black crescent moon with a five pointed star etched into it. The irony was not lost on me. But I had always had a fascination with the moon and stars. So when I spotted this lighter in a mall when I was fifteen, I convinced the cashier to sell it to me. I had kept it with me everyday since, it was something to remind me of a part of who I am.

After I lit my cigarette I leaned back to enjoy it for a moment. I had finally run out the day before. I could feel Sadler watching me. I didn’t think he would condemn me for my bad habit, after all I was smoking one of his. Although me being underage might cause comment. I kept the smoke aimed out the door, and a couple moments later he joined