Don’t Believe Them, Leah Parker [mobile ebook reader txt] 📗

round my neck. Yes, I have a key to my door that I keep on some string round my neck. I double checked that it was locked and it was, definitely. I can finally say that I am paranoid; every time Mary walked upstairs, I got a lump in my throat just in case she had a key to my room and saw my bag stuffed under my bed. If she did, we’d have to abort the plan and I would have to carry on living with the boy who lied to the world. That would be a disaster! More of a disaster than Pompeii. Okay, I’m exaggerating a bit but only a bit. Not much. I would rather have been in my Spanish class than live with him for another day. I know it sounds extreme but that’s truly how I feel right now. He told everyone I killed Tucker, yes, I wanted to. That’s why when he beat me up, I used all my energy to hurt him and I beat the life out of him. I just feel really upset because my friends killed him. It’s not man-slaughter, it’s murder. That word is scary but it is, by law, that’s what it is and I’m not for it. I could beat someone up really badly but I could never kill them. That’s just disgusting but so many things promote it like films and music. No one should be killed especially nobody innocent like a child or an animal but certainly a murderer or rapist. Yes, they should be given the electric chair. Why anyone breaks the law, I do not know. And I will never know.

Okay, it’s midnight. I just heard dad pull up and I know it’s him because he gave me his number plate and it matches. Carefully, I climbed out of the window where dad grabbed my legs and pulled me down. It wasn’t my dad…

I gasped. Who was it?

 

“Shhh Jesse, your dad’s fine and so is little Ally. You do not need to worry. I’m here to protect you.” The strange woman said to me. It was pitch black and I only saw one light, it was on her chest.

“Who are you and what have you done with my family?” Sounds cliché but I was actually very scared. She turned around and on her back written in big yellow lettering was the word GARDA. I nodded my head at her and she followed me into her car. Was my dad a criminal? Ally. What’s going to happen to her?

My heart was racing faster than the Dragster. My hands were clammy and my throat and mouth were as dry as a bone.

27/9

 

Last night was so weird. The kind lady took me to Scott’s wife’s house where she was cuddling Ally. She took me in like I was her own and she looked after me the whole night. She re-cleaned my head and re-bandaged it. Her name is Mallory and she has the bluest eyes in the world. Andrew hair is darker than night. She was the ideal mother, and Ally was lucky to always have her no matter what she does.

Mallory was telling me all about how Scott was working with a scam artist and how he was almost forced to rob a bank so they arrested him and the other members of the ‘clan’. It was so shocking to know that my dad is a criminal and I couldn’t do anything about it. I want to know why the Garda woman took me to Belfast to stay with someone I do not know instead of taking me to my biological mother who lives in Dublin, still. My mum isn’t a bad person, it was what I did to her that made her hit me. I honestly don’t blame her, if I were her, I would hit me too. And that says something about myself- I hate myself and all the dumb things I’ve ever done in my life. But everyone moves on and that is something I need to learn, I need to learn that no matter what I do, there will always be someone there for me. Even if it is Mallory.

It was so cute. Mallory allowed me to hold my baby sister and Ally looked up at me with her gigantic blue eyes. It was like she knew who I was even though she was only eight months old. “She looks just like you.” Mallory told me placing her hand carefully on my lap. I looked up at her and she was smiling at me. I smiled back, being a polite boy and then, breaking silence, Ally decided she was hungry so Mallory took her into the kitchen to feed her. I was just sat there awkward for a split moment. When Mallory came back in, she didn’t have my little sis in her arms as she had laid her down. Mallory and I were sitting and whispering to each other so we didn’t wake the little being sleeping in the kitchen. I always thought it was weird to have a baby sleep in a travel crib in the kitchen. The kitchen that has loads of knives and sharp objects; if she woke up and got out of her crib, she could potentially have grabbed a knife off the counter and killed herself with it- God forbid.

Even though Ally is only eight months, I really feel like I know her like she’s a real person. I know she is a real person but I mean like I feel like I’ve known her for years, and she’s my baby sister- nobody else’s but mine. Now I sound very overprotective of her but when she grows up, I am going to do anything in my power to make sure nothing bad ever happens to her. If anything did happen to her, her overprotective big brother will take care of it. I will make sure she doesn’t get into the wrong crowd and if she ever did, I will stop it immediately. I don’t care what anyone says, I’ve been bullied, I’ve sussed out a teenage terrorist, I’ve been beat up and I have been betrayed. I know what it’s like and I wouldn’t wish any of that onto anybody- not even Michael.

I was watching a tv show with Mallory and Ally, and Ally was crying so Mal placed her carefully onto the floor. It was adorable because she held onto the coffee table and stood up. I gasped when she did this as when she stood up, she began to walk. Fair enough, she fell at my feet, but she still took her first steps. And they were towards me! What more can I ask for?

Mal just got off the phone and I knew it was urgent because she walked into the kitchen, my mum used to do that, and when she came back out she told me, “I’ve got to go to the station. You’re babysitting.” Before I could say anything, she scurried out. I wondered why she hurried off like that. Is she late to work? Is she cheating on my dad? I don’t know. At least I was babysitting my sister and I could pretty much do what I want but if I went upstairs, she had to come with me because there was no way I was leaving an eight month old to do what she likes where I can’t watch over her. No way.

After about an hour, Mallory came back home but with an uninvited guest. My dad.

“Why did you do that?” I gasped. It couldn’t be true, could it? I didn’t even know what he had done to end up in jail and I’m not too sure I ever want to know. It must have been something serious because his bail was set up to €5000 and that is stupid money.

“Hey champ!” Scott said to me punching my arm playfully. I just looked at him.

“Don’t call me that. I am not your son, you are not my dad. We haven’t seen each other for twelve years.” I replied. It sounds extremely rude, but it was the truth. He wasn’t my dad, he was just a guy who happened to have the same DNA as me.

 

1/10

 

It’s finally October and Scott is being a complete eejit near me. Okay, I get it. He wants to make up lost time, but I’m not interested. Last night he literally came home with the new iPhone for me and I just turned him down. It doesn’t sound like I’m being a good child, but he wasn’t there when I needed him most. When my Bulimia was killing me. He doesn’t deserve to have me unless he proves to me that he was wrong. And that doesn’t mean to buy me off, like bringing me the new iPhone. That’s buying me off and I won’t stand for that. I’m sorry but I’m not that kid he remembers. In all honesty, I don’t remember him at all. I just remember seeing mum rip up pictures of us together and them together. She has moved on, why can’t he? Okay, I sound like a snobby child but I’m not, I’m being truthful. Isn’t that the key to all relationships? That’s what I thought.

Scott wasn’t even that great with Ally. He didn’t know how to change her when she was crying or when Mallory told him to. I saw him, he put a fresh nappy onto the dirty one. I’m 15 and I know how to change a child and I have never done anything to do with children. He has two children and doesn’t do diddly squat with either. Ally didn’t want to eat because she was full and he forced the teat down her throat. That’s not right. No child should ever have that done. If they’re full, they’re full. There’s nothing you can do about it. He even treated Mallory like she was an alien coming from mars. In other words he’s very misogynistic. No man should be that bad. If you don’t know what that means, it means that you don’t care about women at all. It’s like sexism, but only against women.

Okay, I’m a fifteen year old boy now living in Belfast with a woman he doesn’t know, a baby sister he loves to death and his dad he hasn’t seen in twelve years. I’ve been put into care and had the world hear lies about me and now I’m with Mallory. She actually cares about me. Yes, my life is messed up but I like it this way. I may be bulimic too, but I’m overcoming that. I just don’t like the way my ‘dad’ is trying to bond with me when he doesn’t know anything about me which hurts a lot because he hasn’t even asked and that’s not what a dad does. I’m dreadfully sorry but that’s the truth. No father goes out to buy their son the new iPhone then expect everything to be fine. I want him to actually care about me, I want him to know everything about me and I mean everything. Every last detail is crucial in order to save or even start our relationship. Every time I’m around him, my anxiety sets in and I start to panic as I never know what he can do. I think I just have trust issues thanks to people in my past. It leaves me wishing for less.

“Jesse-Ringo?” Dad peered over at me. Politely, I looked his way. “You do realise I do love and care about you, right?” Looking into his huge eyes, I saw a man who did care about me. Was that him? With tears welling up in my eyes, I nodded my head. I allowed the tear to drip down my rosy cheeks so he would see how much I need him.

“Erm, I’m going upstairs to moisturise me face. Bye dad.” We held hands until I walked so far