Heal The Abuse - Recover Your Life, Jason Goodwin [ink book reader .txt] 📗

refuse to take action. They refuseto change. It is possible to heal the pain of sexual abuse in thesame way that we would work to heal any other issue. There is hope.The more you heal the stronger you feel, and the easier itgets.

Personal Journal Entries

Entry #1:Gaining Hope

(My depressed voice): I have nothing to livefor. I might as well sleep all day and not wake up. I feeldepressed. My thoughts are all negative. Why do I feel sohopeless?

I am tormented by the memory of sexual abuse.There is no changing the reality of my past. What happened to mewas horrible, and sexual abuse continues to happen to people allover the world. There is no way to stop it. I will never overcomethis.

Life is so meaningless. Healing sexual abuseis too difficult.

(My wise, inner voice): Don’t believe thatyour life is hopeless. That’s your depression talking. You’re justthinking negatively about your past, your present, and your future.Stop doubting yourself and your ability to heal.

You are afraid that you will never be free ofthis. That you will be dealing with this pain forever. But intruth, all pain is limited. All fears are eventually conquered. Allissues are eventually resolved and a brighter future awaitsyou.

You will overcome this. You will find thecourage. You will regain your integrity, your confidence, and yourself-esteem. You will feel better. You will have peace again. Youwill see the light.

Your pain is not “all powerful.” You arepowerful, eternal, strong, wise, and capable. As a child of God,there is nothing that can defeat you. You are stronger than sexualabuse. You are stronger than fear.

Process Questions

In what ways have I felt hopeless abouthealing the pain of sexual abuse?

How do I look at my life when I feelhopeless?

How do I act when I feel hopeless?

What would make me feel more hopeful abouthealing the abuse of my past?

How can I process my issues (sit with myfeelings, cry, get my anger out in a healthy way, do somejournaling, talk to someone about how I feel, etc…)

Exercise1-1

Hope Affirmations

-Say these things to yourself every day untilyou start to feel more confident and filled with hope.

1. Things in my life keep getting better, andevery day I am getting healthier.

2. I am working through my issues.

3. I am succeeding.

4. I feel more confident and more hopefulevery day.

5. I am stronger than my fear.

6. I am overcoming my problems.

7. I am feeling more energy, moreinspiration, and more love.

8. I am becoming a bigger, wiser, strongerperson.

Stepping Stones to Health

Hope

-Try to identify where you are in thestepping-stones to health, and the next step or steps you need totake.

_____ 1. I am severely depressed and addictedto several substances or behaviors. I fear that my life will neverimprove.

_____ 2. I have known people who havesuccessfully worked through their sexual abuse issues, but I don’tthink I can.

_____ 3. I am trying to learn more aboutsexual abuse, but I don’t spend much time reading self-help booksor working on my issues.

_____ 4. I worked through an issue I washaving, but it was scary. I don’t want to change. I’m used to thechaos in my life, and it’s easier for me to do nothing.

_____ 5. I did something to heal an issue Iwas having and it made me feel better about myself. I realize thathealing is possible if I am willing to work at it.

_____ 6. I am getting tired of the chaos inmy life. I know there’s something better for me. I’m tired of myaddictions and my negative behaviors because they cause me a lot ofpain.

_____ 7. I want to change, but I still feelreally confused.

_____ 8. I’m tired of the pain in my life,and I want to do something about it. But I’m so addicted anddepressed that I don’t know where to begin. I don’t know if I havethe courage to do this.

_____ 9. I have attempted to change anaddiction or behavior and it’s difficult. I’m experiencing a lot offeelings I’m uncomfortable with.

_____ 10. I have overcome an addiction orbehavior and realize that there is hope for me. If I can heal oneaspect of the sexual abuse, I can probably heal another.

_____ 11. I have bought some books on healingsexual abuse, joined a support group, or begun counseling for mysexual abuse issues. I am starting to get serious abouthealing.

_____ 12. I am committed to working throughmy issues. I know it will take time, but it can be done. I willspend whatever time I need to heal my pain, because I see how muchit benefits my self-esteem, my relationships, and my life.

Chapter 2 –Goals

“We cannot afford to give up on our goals,because we cannot

afford to give up on ourselves.”

-Jason Goodwin

Alcoholics Anonymous urges us to take ourlives “one day at a time.” We need to focus on the problems we facetoday before we can address the problems that may arise tomorrow.Sometimes, when we are living in a period of intense crisis, we mayeven be better off living one minute at a time.

Problems can feel overwhelming when we try totake on too much at once. Yet there comes a time when we need toplan for a better future. Without direction, our lives can feelmeaningless. When we get trapped in this hopeless place, we onlyhave ourselves to blame.

Responsibility is the key to action, to hope,and to self-esteem. Yes, we need support from others. We may needGod or our higher power to show us the way. But at the end of theday, it is still up to us.

It’s important to remember that the goals weset for ourselves should be realistic. I engaged in a year ofintense self-examination before writing the material for this book.And before that, I was acting out my sexual abuse issues for over33 years.

When defining our goals, it’s important tokeep in mind the challenges we face. Sexual abuse often leads tolow self-esteem, drug and alcohol abuse, sexual addiction, abusiveand/or unfulfilling relationships, depression, flashbacks to thetrauma or