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old to be recruited as a new member of their agencies. I also think that is some embarrassment on both sides. I do not know how much I shared with them and I feel ambivalent about calling them out as being the masterminds of the plot to invade my mind and to, for some reason, super technologically physically attack my body with pains. On their side, they might not want to reveal that they actually had an interest in recruiting me. Furthermore, they did spend months of my life harassing and borderline torturing me, and they might not want that to come to light. That might not be something that they would want to admit to. All of this is sad, because some of the behavior that crossed the line probably did not need to happen, especially after they may have decided that I was no longer a recruit candidate. If I am no longer a recruit candidate, that is sad, because I would like the opportunity to help America and the world.

Instead, I have made a book, telling of my experience, so that others can know what it was like, and I have told my readers things about aliens, spirits, God, and many other very important things. You are now reading the finished product of my endeavor to write a book. It was a goal for me, and I am happy to have reached it. My mother always told me that I would write a book. This is not the book that she wanted me to write. She does not approve of my contact with aliens, and she believes in God but in a different way than I do. The God that I believe in is more loving and understanding and less judgmental. He grants afterlives to those who honestly seek him with an open heart. I feel that this God is real, and I am happy to be a strong part of his kingdom. I have told you the things I know first, so you have gotten the inside scoop.

I said that I did not trust the aliens or beings behind my harassment in a YouTube video because I don't. I would choose to remain independent but to work with them if I could to prevent them from bringing further harm to me and to others.

The beings that I speak of can be highly immature, but they are very technologically advanced, and, in ways, wise. I have, however, gained their respect with my intelligence, and gained respect of the aliens for the human race. I hope that other individuals will not have to go through the isolation and pain that I went through to gain peace in their lives.

I will close this chapter of the book for now, but thank you for reading and feel free to contact me with thoughts and questions whenever you want to, and I will try to respond promptly. Goodbye for now.

What is Heaven like? If everything is perfect, won’t it get boring?

I have experienced pieces of what I would imagine heaven to be like in my life on Earth. I am very lucky. Some of them have been through a sense of accomplishment. Some have been in music. Some have been during sex and others have been more associated with deep love (I am quite lucky in this). Some have been in food. And I do have to tell you, though this is bound to be quite controversial: The number two completely reliable way to experience a temporary sense of bliss is with substances, or drugs. Some drugs are legal, so hopefully I do not have to be a total iconoclast to say so, but other drugs are not legal. I have used some drugs that were not legal, and I would experiment with more, if I could do it safely and without fear of prosecution. I will say that love and sex are the number one reliable ways to experience bliss, and I will do it with a smile. But love and sex takes at least two people, and someone will not always be there when you want them to be, unless you are perhaps even luckier than I am. So that brings us back to drugs.

As for what heaven could be like. I thought that I heard that it could be a place where you are allowed to do the things that you like to do with the people that you like around you. You would still have the chance to achieve things, everyone would still be themselves and conflict would not die overnight, but everyone there would be understanding and able to pursue their happiness there unhindered. Surely that sounds like enough for me.

Will eternal life get boring?

I do not think that it has to. There will almost always be work to be done, and if the day ever comes when there is no work left to be done, we can simply create. We can make art, and poetry, and music, and we can compete, and we can share and have conversations and argue and come back together and smile and love and laugh.

If anyone gets too bored of this, that person should be free to take a rest until they feel refreshed again. I do not think that I will tire of life, but anything is possible. We can help each other to appreciate the big and the little things about life until the end of our days.

What is your opinion about legalizing certain drugs?

I think that drugs should be legal. I think that almost all of them should be. You should have to be of a certain age to buy them, but you should be allowed to if you have proven yourself to be a responsible adult. I think that, if you have to go to a hospital because of your drug use, perhaps you should have your license temporarily suspended (perhaps for 15-30 days). I think that alcohol is very good too, and people who have their drug license suspended can still use alcohol to achieve a less intense warm sense of well-being feeling.

As always, there should be strong penalties for trying to steal drugs, and they should be protected in stores by guards.

Perhaps it should be up to the community to decide whether they want to have drugs legalized where other people live. I do not think that people should be on drugs in public, and the laws should be like alcohol. That means that there should be no being noticeably on drugs in public, and no driving a motor vehicle while under the influence of drugs.

However, what people do in the privacy of their own homes and safely should be up to them. The government should not regulate that.

That is just my opinion, and it probably will never come true. However, at the very least, I think that marijuana use should not be against the law. The drug seems to be not especially harmful, and it seems to be less harmful to the body perhaps than alcohol, which is legal. I think that it should be allowed for people who are over the age of 18 to use marijuana.

I have safely used hallucinogenic drugs to expand my mind, and it was a life changing experience. It taught me to question reality, and it led me to lead a much richer life. I stand before you the more intelligent and enlightened person that I am today, in part because of my use of those psychoactive drugs. Those psychoactive drugs also played a role in my writing of the poems that I printed that lead off this book. Several of them, including Periscopes were written while I was using substances.

What do you think about the use of alcohol?

I have had to cut down on my alcohol use recently. I used it when I was young, when I was in college and when I was in law school, and it was a good thing for me in many ways. I am naturally somewhat obsessive compulsive, and I desire order and perfection from myself and those around me. Using alcohol allowed me to relax. I did not need to demand that everything was perfect at all times, and it allowed me to get more done. Sometimes, I had a need to brainstorm, and I could do this much more easily when I was affected by alcohol. I could then return to my list of ideas when I was more sober, and I could cut the ideas that did not meet my standards and come up with a list that was only the good ideas that came from my own mind, and none of the bad ones.

It is not a fun life to be paralyzed by perfectionism and indecision. Sometimes, you need to make decisions and be willing to face the consequences of those decisions, even if you do not spend as much time as possible to analyze the positives and negatives of each possible decision. “While we are young!” those who wait on you to decide will exclaim, and you do not have forever to make decisions, or else you will make very few decisions.

As it turns out, my experiences in making decisions while affected by alcohol have allowed me to see that side of life. They have allowed me to think and decide even while not using that substance. But I had to get there through experience. That experience would have been more painful, I believe, if I could not have gone through it, first, with alcohol to numb the pain and anxiety.

Lowered inhibitions are not always a bad thing:

For certain uptight perfectionist individuals like myself, there will never be a perfect thing to say or to do. There will be problems with everything that we say, and we will be judged by those who we communicate with for our errors. Sometimes, saying the first thing that comes to your mind can be very good. It can allow you to simply speak and to get feedback and to move on. I still have a moral compass and a sense that I do not want to hurt others, even when I have lowered inhibitions. If others are hurt by the decisions that I make, I am not shy to apologize. I have learned that I make mistakes. Making mistakes is inevitable if you act. And sometimes acting is just what is necessary.

One of the greatest pains in my life comes from when people will not accept an apology. There are some people who used to be in my life that I have apologized to, but they have never responded to my communications. I think that some of them had knowledge of the conspiracy against me to spy on me and they profited by learning that I was being messed with and not telling me what they knew or suspected about it. However, that does not mean that I never did anything wrong by them. I am a big proponent of “keeping your side of the street clean.”

Why “keep your side of the street clean?”

I think that if you can do something nice for someone without great cost to yourself, you should do it. An apology costs nothing but perhaps your pride, so I always think an apology should be offered. People will show their true nature in time, and even if they reveal themselves to be unsavory individuals, if you apologize to them before it is too late, you can rest easy knowing that there is nothing else that you could have done right by them to try to heal any wrongdoing that you may have perpetrated upon them. You will also be able to sleep better at night if you have fewer enemies.

If we all operate by “an eye for an eye,” eventually we will all be blind, and we will miss out on the richness of visual experience. I do not think that anyone wants this. We should be good to each other where we can,

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