The Easy Way to Handle Anxiety, Johnny Montoya [the chimp paradox TXT] 📗

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The Easy Way To Handle Anxiety

 

Anyone Can Do It!

 

JOHNNY MONTOYA

 

http://www.amazon.com/author/johnnymontoya

 

The Easy Way To Handle Anxiety

Anyone Can Do It!

 

Copyright © 2014 Johnny Montoya

 

http://www.amazon.com/author/johnnymontoya

 

All rights reserved

This book or any portion thereof
may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever
without the express written permission of the publisher
except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

 

Disclaimer:

The information contained within this book is not intended to be a substitute for professional clinical advice. Diagnosis and treatment of a clinical condition can only be undertaken by a qualified professional. Readers of this book should always seek the advice of a qualified health professional with any questions regarding their health or a medical condition. Neither the author nor the publisher guarantees the accuracy, quality, suitability or reliability of any information contained in this book.

AAAAARRRRGGGHH!!!

Wait, I'll be with you in a moment. Just having a panic attack.

 

Aaaaarrrrggghh!!!

 

OK, that's better. Anyway, hi, I'm Johnny Montoya. And I'm going to show you the easy way to handle anxiety. Just like the title says.

 

If you struggle with general anxiety, then this book is for you. I can't help you with any other related issues that you might have, but for your anxiety, I can definitely help you with that.

 

So how come you've developed anxiety? Has a series of stressful events been building up? Maybe you've never really had the chance to learn how to cope with life's difficulties. Maybe you worry about another person or circumstances that are out of your control. Or you could just be a natural worrier.

 

Any of these things can make someone susceptible to helplessness, and feeling like something bad could happen at any time. Unfortunately (and annoyingly), this tends to spread into areas where you're otherwise confident, making you feel a bit stupid. But whatever it is, I'm going to be blunt and tell you that it's all in your mind. You do know that, right? It's a problem that's within you, but it can be dealt with. And so it should be.

 

Why?

 

Well, having anxiety can affect your ability to get things done, you can end up missing out on things in life, and it stops you from enjoying your life properly. It limits you and holds you back.

 

People might look at you weird when you have one of your funny moments, making you self conscious and inhibited.

 

Most likely you'll be disappointed and frustrated. You know you can do better, but this invisible barrier stops you from being who you want to be.

 

It's horrible, isn't it?

 

Trust me, I know what it's like. On the morning of New Year's Day, 2001, I had my first panic attack. I was at a train station on the way home from a friend's house, and I realised that I was hungry. So I grabbed something to eat, I got my train, and quickly started eating. All was well.

 

As the train approached one of the last stations before the one that I was meant to get off at, I spotted a couple of ticket inspectors. This was bad news because I didn't have a ticket (I was a rebel). When they came I just said sorry I don't have a ticket. They said well you're going to have to pay a fine, and out came the notepads.

 

As I gave them my details I started to feel sick. They could see this, so they mercifully decided to let me off at the station that was coming up. As I gratefully walked off I puked a bit, which was embarrassing.

 

While waiting for the next train I was slightly shaken up. It was OK though because all I had to do was relax and take deep breaths, as you do, right?

 

In fact it got worse. I quickly began feeling fear, dread and helplessness, like I was in danger. I had no idea where this was coming from or how to handle it.

 

Was it because I'd been eating quickly? Was I still a bit drunk from the night before? (you know, New Year's Eve) Or both? It was so confusing, I couldn't figure it out, which made it worse still.

 

I desperately needed to be at home, and a train would have gotten me there fast, but none came. So I left to get a bus.

 

The feeling continued but eventually a bus came. I grabbed a newspaper on the seat next to me and immersed myself in it to distract myself.

 

It made only a slight difference, and this irritated me. I felt like something really bad was going to happen, or that there was something wrong with me. I felt fundamentally threatened by something, and it was all new to me so I had no way of dealing with it.

 

The horrible feeling followed me all the way home, and even then it went on for a while longer, before eventually dissolving away.

 

That was my first and worst ever panic attack by far. What a lovely start to the year. I'll never forget it.

 

Since then I've had about 7 or 8 panic attacks, and many uncomfortable moments worrying that it's going to happen again. Being far from home has often been challenging. You know, I'd rather have 1 guaranteed panic attack a year and none of the silly worrying, than live in fear of having one.

 

But time is a great healer and I've made a lot of progress. I still have anxiety at times but now it's more like an occasional annoyance than a major thing.

 

That train incident was bad, but now I choose to focus on everything that's positive about it. The way I competently got myself home despite feeling so horrible inside. The fact that I wisely picked up a paper to keep myself distracted. And the way I talked myself through it, constantly reassuring myself, and calmly looking for solutions.

 

If you'd seen me while it was happening you would have noticed something but you wouldn't guess that I was having a major panic attack. Even at the time a part of me was smiling about that.

 

You know what it felt like? It felt like a stronger part of me came out that day to take care of things. It got me thinking about just how in control I really was.

 

Since then, I've developed a philosophy about how to deal with anxiety, which I'm going to share with you now. It has worked for me, and I hope it will rub off on you.

 

I believe that...

 

* There's always a way for you to deal with anxiety. There are always lots of little things that you can do to feel better in any situation. Even small things can make all the difference. You just have to find them. It's OK to do whatever works for you.

 

* You have the ability to create a Safe Zone. You create it by establishing a feeling of calm in everyday situations and places. Then you take that feeling with you wherever you go. And you can expand that zone as far as you like, at your own pace.

 

* You are free to focus on the positive. There's no rule that says you have to give any importance to negative things. Every single thing that happens to you, no matter how it looks at first, has a positive aspect. It's your job to find it, strengthen it with attention, and watch it take over. It's actually you who is in control the whole time.

 

* You have the power to weaken anxiety with humour. Anxiety is silly. It hasn't earned the right to be taken seriously by you, so don't hand your power over. Laugh at it.

 

* You're lucky to have anxiety. It may be silly, but it sure makes for a test of your inner strength. You've got a golden opportunity to make big changes to your personality and the way you deal with life. Play it right and you will be stronger.

 

Those are my principles, and that's why I wrote this book for you. If you can get on board with my beliefs, then we can do this.

How should I deal with anxiety?

When we're anxious we feel helpless and incapable of turning things around. We feel like we're at the mercy of this thing that seems to have a life of its own. There's a sense of being in a threatening, volatile situation, like we could be in danger at any moment. We become negative and blind to any possibility of a solution or way out. We end up taking it all so seriously and it dominates our lives. Ultimately we want this useless and inconvenient thing to just go away. It has no benefit to us and it's causing us nothing but suffering.

 

But there are solutions. For example, exposure therapy. Exposure therapy is an approach where you basically just jump right in and put yourself in a situation where you're likely to panic. By all means you're welcome to try it, if you think you can handle it. It works, but be prepared for it to backfire from time to time. Understandably, it's enough to put many people off. I'm guessing that you'd like something easier, at least for now.

 

Well, the way that you and I are going to sort this out is simply by putting my beliefs into practise. The kind of approach that we want is one where we can see solutions, as well as our ability to implement them. One that emphasises a feeling of safety and comfort, which we can progressively internalise. We want to be preoccupied with positivity as much as possible, and we want to keep a light hearted attitude and perspective. And crucially, we want to develop an appreciation of what can be learned from the experience of having been an anxious person, and how it can make us better, stronger people!