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doing anymore harm but pushes Jueleous out his way saying racial slurs pushing him again Jueleous reacts with a punch to the face knocking him down to his knees with a nosebleed Jueleous:I don't care how black you are how bad you think you are you just know this and that's we're both in the same boat black and brown)we collect Latiya and head back home after resolving the confrontation with me not finishing what i had to say remaining silent throughout the short trip.The following monday comes and I'm leaning against my locker waiting for Jueleous to show up 1 minute 2 minutes 3 minutes 4 minutes now 5 long minutes seems like forever i can't wait no longer and go on my way to class but get pulled into the bathroom by my hair then slammed into a stall door it's Ranice and her two girl crew Ranice:You need to learn to stay out of my business what was going on between me and James lastnight had nothing to do with you or Jueleous we have our struggles and our days just like anybody else but you know what don't worry I'll fix that in a hurry starting with your face.) bumping into my shoulder she walks steadily out the restroom giving me those looks again while i try to catch my breath.I arrive in class 2 minutes late but still no Jueleous i looked all around the classroom for him still no sign tapping my feet and flinging my pen 10 minutes into class and still no Jueleous this was so unlike him he never had an absent day out of school wich makes me worry a little bit until 20 minutes go by and he rushes in with a note sitting at his assigned seat not saying a word nor does he look my way like he doesn't know me anymore or notices me wich makes me worry even more i tried whispering to him but get no response and just give up and focus on my classwork when lunchtime came around he walked pass my table ignoring me once again not giving me any kind of explanation for his silence making me think i did something wrong or something happened that he won't tell me whatever it was i was getting worried after i go to my next class but gets stopped by Jueleous who stops me with a kiss on the lips telling me he loved me then walks out the building as if in a rush Latiya seeing me show a look of concern Latiya:Are you ok? where is Jueleous going school isn't over yet) all i could tell her was i don't know that was all i could say and think for that moment then it was just us walking together til i get pushed into a locker by Ranice who gets in my face picking at me for a fight pointing her fingers and breathing down my neck Latiya tries calming her down but gets pushed out the way Ranice aiming her fist in my direction in fear i shield myself away mumbling in prayer for god to save me protect me and help me bringing her fist down it gets caught from behind by Aidess who stands her and her crew Aidess:no friend nor foe shall lay a hand upon her do so i'll and i shall curse you in the name of my father) pulling away she jumps away in anger he approaches her looking deep her eyes with the voice of god speaking in her head giving her the same warning with a deep voice like thunder Ranice along with her friends walk off as if they've seen a ghost in their pressence.I unveil my eyes to see i'm alone surrounded only by classrooms lockers and silence.

 

Chapter.10

When i get home i call Jueleous's cell from the house phone but get no answer it keeps ringing until i get his voicemail leaving a message hoping he gets it hoping he's ok 3hours later i still get no callback looking out the front door he doesn't show up calling him again i still get no answer just his voicemail and leave another everyday i called before and after school and still no answer telling Latiya about the situation but tells me to just move on then tries cheering me up with bogus excuses to make it easier on me but the feeling of not having him around really ate at me some nights it drove me crazy and other days i cried even crying myself to sleep i prayed to god to bring him back praying as much as i can and as hard as i could a week turns to weeks a month turns to months then give up knowing i won't see Jueleous again seeing there was no point in trying instead from here on out it was just me and Latiya.Wednesday afternoon after coming home school i see mom sitting at the kitchen table drinking bottled water happy to see me she sips her water explaining how her day was Mom:Today was fully complete for me i mean normally when i get up in the morning of course i poor a drink for goodluck never told you that but anyway i get up this morning and for some reason i don't feel the need to drink and as far as work wise i got promoted to Center manager but then it got more interesting when a when a young man came knocking on my door dressed in a suit and shoes speaking the good words of god now at first i thought ok maybe he wants me to join his church or something from the way he spoke verses from the good book he intrigued me for hours while you were at school we sat at the kitchen table talking about the ways of god then left two minutes later before you walked in the door) hearing that news was good to hear i haven't seen my mom this joyful in long time didn't think Aidess would appear before anyone i knew but me i guess i was wrong on that end later that evening as the sun was setting i just had dinner and now sitting in front of my window writting in my diary explaining my thoughts on today like i do every other day explaining my thoughts on Jueleous walking out my life and if what we had meant anything to him as it did to me and if the way i felt about him even mattered.The first time we kissed it took my breath away making me feel i could never be alone the way he spoke made my heart jump and now without him it feels like I'm falling endlessly into a blackhole where ever he may be all i can say is where ever he may be i hope to see him again.Four years later it was the day of my prom me and mom went out to pick a dress for me some guy named Samuel asked me out wich was thoughtful i didn't think anyone would i was timid but didn't say no he always had his eyes on me in math class passing notes and leaving flowers at my locker how sweet at least i have somebody's attention.Mom picks out a purple silk dress with one shoulder strap with a silver rose hair pn and matching black glittering heels i look at the dress from front and back knowing it's a beautiful look for me matched to my liking.I take it to the counter as mom pays for it with a credit card before i could reach down in my pocket to get the i've saved up for the last 8 months doing odd jobs here and there Mom:No need honey this is your day it's all on me don't worry about it) mom's been waiting on this moment forever now she's treating me like a royal barbie in a way i guess i could say i like it but can be annoying to a certain extent but then again it's motherly love so why complain? we've been more interactive with eachother more often then before now that she's been sober off the booze for the last 5 years that's makes me so happy for her and me knowing how close we are getting she only drinks water and tea and some soft drinks she dumped all the liquor in the sink then called it quits now that is a strong woman....a real strong woman .I walk over to the corner of the store to a rotating platform of shades trying on a few pairs i hear a couple of girls in the background behind me making rude comments about me and the way I look I put the shades back and walk out the store with mom running behind me with concern asking what's wrong I tell her it's nothing not fooled she sees the girls walk out rolling their eyes then gives me some enlightenment Mom:no matter what peaple say no matter how they see you just know your a beautiful lady and as long as i can see it and a good man can see it their words are as brittle as bones remember your mother told you this) just hearing those words brought back my joy and put a smile on my face and we head home early.Later that evening i stand in the bathroom putting on makeup starting with my light violet lip gloss then my eye shadow mom styled my hair in a bun with a curl in the front while checking my dress from front to back just when i thought i was all set and ready my cellphone rings checking it. I see it’s Sam and I answer asking if I’m ready looking in the mirror one more time I get my coat and wait outside less than 30 seconds later Sam shows up in his flashing red classic Chevy nova he steps out the car wearing a black tux with a purple tie and vest it surprised me how I didn’t know we were gonna be matching I guess I’ll count that as a bonus I mean does get straight A’s in all his classes except P.E wich he has a D in as of now how is that possible? Simple everyday in P.E instead of going to dress out he just types on his laptop study for another class or sneaks off to go get high with a few friends smoking pot regular high school nerd but with a little spunk to him.Mom rushes outside with her camera as Sam offers me a rose cassage looking in his eyes I can tell he’s nervous and a little sweaty but all above he’s a great guy we take a picture in front of his car with his arms around me wich was the first time since Jueleous I ever let a guy touch me like that.I still smiled to the camera without worry then we’re off to the dance when getting there we get our picture taken at the entrance then off to the dance floor where we see other students dancing with their partners slow dancing to the country love music Sam:Shall we dance?) offering his hand with a bow I chuckle and take it with s smile and together we dance like the very few others who can’t look their partners in the eyes me and Sam locked our focus on eachother as we not once looked away his footwork was sharp his hands were smooth and he smelled like a real gentleman.The party lights go out for a brief second while still holding our positions’’Gee looks like a fuse blew out well I knew that was coming sooner or later since the cords are half chewed in the girls locker from what you think? I ask

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