The Attache; Or, Sam Slick In England(Fiscle Part-3), Thomas Chandler Haliburton [best ereader for pdf TXT] 📗

Remembered Those Lessons Of Duty."

 

He Then Inquired Into The State Of Her Family,  Whether

The Boy Who Was Training A Peach-Tree Against The End Of

The House Was Her Son,  And Many Other Matters Not Necessary

To Record With The Same Precision That I Have Enumerated

The Furniture.

 

"Oh,  Here Is A Pretty Little Child!" Said He. "Come Here,

Dear,  And Shake Hands Along With Me. What Beautiful Hair

She Has! And She Looks So Clean And Nice,  Too. Every

Thing And Every Body Here Is So Neat,  So Tidy,  And So

Appropriate. Kiss Me,  Dear; And Then Talk To Me; For I

Love Little Children. 'Suffer Them To Come Unto Me,' Said

Our Master,  'For Of Such Is The Kingdom Of Heaven:' That

Is,  That We Should Resemble These Little Ones In Our

Innocence."

 

He Then Took Her On His Knee. "Can You Say The Lord's

Prayer,  Dear?"

 

"Yes,  Sir."

 

"Very Good. And The Ten Commandments?"

 

"Yes,  Sir."

 

"Who Taught You?"

 

"My Mother,  Sir; And The Parson Taught Me The Catechism."

 

"Why,  Sam,  This Child Can Say The Lord's Prayer,  The Ten

Commandments,  And The Catechism. Ain't This Beautiful?

Tell Me The Fifth,  Dear."

 

And The Child Repeated It Distinctly And Accurately.

 

"Right. Now,  Dear,  Always Bear That In Mind,  Especially

Towards Your Mother. You Have An Excellent Mother; Her

Cares And Her Toils Are Many; And Amidst Them All,  How

Well She Has Done Her Duty To You. The Only Way She Can

Be Repaid,  Is To Find That You Are What She Desires You

To Be,  A Good Girl. God Commands This Return To Be Made,

And Offers You The Reward Of Length Of Days. Here Is A

Piece Of Money For You. And Now,  Dear," Placing Her Again

Upon Her Feet,  "You Never Saw So Old A Man As Me,  And

Never Will Again; And One,  Too,  That Came From A Far-Off

Country,  Three Thousand Miles Off; It Would Take You A

Long Time To Count Three Thousand; It Is So Far. Whenever

You Do What You Ought Not,  Think Of The Advice Of The

'Old Minister.'"

 

Here Mr. Slick Beckoned The Mother To The Door,  And

Volume 1 Chapter 11 (Cottages) Pg 60

Whispered Something To Her,  Of Which,  The Only Words That

Met My Ear Were "A Trump," "A Brick," "The Other Man Like

Him Ain't Made Yet," "Do It,  He'll Talk,  Then."

 

To Which She Replied,  "I Have--Oh Yes,  Sir--By All Means."

 

She Then Advanced To Mr. Hopewell,  And Asked Him If He

Would Like To Smoke.

 

"Indeed I Would,  Dear,  But I Have No Pipe Here."

 

She Said Her Old Man Smoked Of An Evening,  After His Work

Was Done,  And That She Could Give Him A Pipe And Some

Tobacco,  If He Would Condescend To Use Them; And Going

To The Cupboard,  She Produced A Long White Clay Pipe And

Some Cut Tobacco.

 

Having Filled And Lighted His Pipe,  Mr. Hopewell Said,

"What Church Do You Go To,  Dear?"

 

"The Parish Church,  Sir."

 

"Right; You Will Hear Sound Doctrine And Good Morals

Preached There. Oh This A Fortunate Country,  Sam,  For

The State Provides For The Religious Instruction Of The

Poor. Where The Voluntary System Prevails,  The Poor Have

To Give From Their Poverty,  Or Go Without; And Their

Gifts Are So Small,  That They Can Purchase But Little.

It's A Beautiful System,  A Charitable System,  A Christian

System. Who Is Your Landlord?"

 

"Squire Merton,  Sir; And One Of The Kindest Masters,  Too,

That Ever Was. He Is So Good To The Poor; And The Ladies.

Sir,  They Are So Kind,  Also. When My Poor Daughter Mary

Was So Ill With The Lever,  I Do Think She Would Have Died

But For The Attentions Of Those Young Ladies; And When

She Grew Better,  They Sent Her Wine And Nourishing Things

From Their Own Table. They Will Be So Glad To See You.

Sir,  At The Priory. Oh,  I Wish You Could See Them!"

 

"There It Is,  Sam," He Continued "That Illustrates What

I Always Told You Of Their Social System Here. We May

Boast Of Our Independence,  But That Independence Produces

Isolation. There Is An Individuality About Every Man And

Every Family In America,  That Gives No Right Of Inquiry,

And Imposes No Duty Of Relief On Any One. Sickness,  And

Sorrow,  And Trouble,  Are Not Divulged; Joy,  Success,  And

Happiness Are Not Imparted. If We Are Independent In

Our Thoughts And Actions,  So Are We Left To Sustain The

Burden Of Our Own Ills. How Applicable To Our State Is

That Passage Of Scripture,  'The Heart Knoweth Its Own

Bitterness,  And A Stranger Intermeddleth Not With Its

Joy.'

 

Volume 1 Chapter 11 (Cottages) Pg 61

"Now,  Look At This Poor Family; Here Is A Clergyman

Provided For Them,  Whom They Do Not,  And Are Not Even

Expected To Pay; Their Spiritual Wants Are Ministered

To,  Faithfully And Zealously,  As We See By The Instruction

Of That Little Child. Here Is A Friend Upon Whom They

Can Rely In Their Hour Of Trouble,  As The Bereaved Mother

Did On Elisha. 'And She Went Up And Laid Her Child That

Was Dead On The Bed Of The Man Of God,  And Shut The Door

On Him,  And Went Out.' And When A Long Train Of Agitation,

Mis-Government,  And Ill-Digested Changes Have Deranged

This Happy Country,  As Has Recently Been The Case,  Here

Is An Indulgent Landlord,  Disposed To Lower His Rent Or

Give Further Time For Payment,  Or If Sickness Invades

Any Of These Cottages,  To Seek Out The Sufferer,  To Afford

The Remedies,  And By His Countenance,  His Kindness,  And

Advice,  To Alleviate Their Trouble. Here It Is,  A Positive

Duty Arising From Their Relative Situations Of Landlord

And Tenant. The Tenants Support The Owner,  The Landlord

Protects The Tenants: The Duties Are Reciprocal.

 

"With _Us_ The Duties,  As Far As Christian Duties Can Be

Said To Be Optional,  Are Voluntary; And The Voluntary

Discharge Of Duties,  Like The Voluntary Support Of

Religion,  We Know,  From Sad Experience,  To Be Sometimes

Imperfectly Performed,  At Others Intermitted,  And Often

Wholly Neglected. Oh! It Is A Happy Country This,  A Great

And A Good Country; And How Base,  How Wicked,  How Diabolical

It Is To Try To Set Such A Family As This Against Their

Best Friends,  Their Pastor And Their Landlord; To Instil

Dissatisfaction And Distrust Into Their Simple Minds,

And To Teach Them To Loathe The Hand,  That Proffers

Nothing But Regard Or Relief. It Is Shocking,  Isn't It?"

 

"That's What I Often Say,  Sir," Said Mrs. Hodgins,  "To

My Old Man,  To Keep Away From Them Chartists."

 

"Chartists! Dear,  Who Are They? I Never Heard Of Them."

 

"Why,  Sir,  They Are The Men That Want The Five Pints."

 

"Five Pints! Why You Don't Say So; Oh! They Are Bad Men,

Have Nothing To Do With Them. Five Pints! Why That Is

Two Quarts And A Half; That Is Too Much To Drink If It

Was Water; And If Any Thing Else,  It Is Beastly Drunkenness.

Have Nothing To Do With Them."

 

"Oh! No,  Sir,  It Is Five Points Of Law."

 

"Tut--Tut--Tut! What Have You Got To Do With Law,  My

Dear?"

 

"By Gosh,  Aunty," Said Mr. Slick,  "You Had Better Not

Cut That Pie: You Will Find It Rather Sour In The Apple

Sarce,  And Tough In The Paste,  I Tell _You_."

Volume 1 Chapter 11 (Cottages) Pg 62

 

"Yes,  Sir," She Replied,  "But They Are A Unsettling Of

His Mind. What Shall I Do? For I Don't Like These Night

Meetings,  And He Always Comes Home From 'Em Cross And

Sour-Like."

 

"Well,  I Am Sorry To Hear That," Said Mr. Hopewell,  "I

Wish I Could See Him; But I Can't,  For I Am Bound On A

Journey. I Am Sorry To Hear It,  Dear. Sam,  This Country

Is So Beautiful,  So Highly Cultivated,  So Adorned By

Nature And Art,  And Contains So Much Comfort And Happiness,

That It Resembles Almost The Garden Of Eden. But,  Sam,

The Serpent Is Here,  The Serpent Is Here Beyond A Doubt.

It Changes Its Shape,  And Alters Its Name,  And Takes A

New Colour,  But Still It Is The Serpent,  And It Ought To

Be Crushed. Sometimes It Calls Itself Liberal,  Then

Radical,  Then Chartist,  Then Agitator,  Then Repealer,

Then Political Dissenter,  Then Anti-Corn Leaguer,  And So

On. Sometimes It Stings The Clergy,  And Coils Round Them,

And Almost Strangles Them,  For It Knows The Church Is

Its Greatest Enemy,  And It Is Furious Against It. Then

It Attacks The Peers,  And Covers Them With Its Froth And

Slaver,  And Then It Bites The Landlord. Then It Changes

Form,  And Shoots At The Queen,  Or Her Ministers,  And Sets

Fire To Buildings,  And Burns Up Corn To Increase Distress;

And,  When Hunted Away,  It Dives Down Into The Collieries,

Or Visits The Manufactories,  And Maddens The People,  And

Urges Them On To Plunder And Destruction. It's A Melancholy

Thing To Think Of; But He Is As Of Old,  Alive And Active,

Seeing Whom He Can Allure And Deceive,  And Whoever Listens

Is Ruined For Ever.

 

"Stay,  Dear,  I'll Tell You What I Will Do For You. I'll

Inquire About These Chartists; And When I Go To London,

I Will Write A Little Tract So Plain That Any Child May

Read It And Understand It; And Call It _The Chartist_,

And Get It Printed,  And I Will Send You One For Your

Husband,  And Two Or Three Others,  To Give To Those Whom

They May Benefit.

 

"And Now,  Dear,  I Must Go. You And I Will Never Meet

Again In This World; But I Shall Often Think Of You,  And

Often Speak Of You. I Shall Tell My People Of The Comforts,

Of The Neatness,  Of The Beauty Of An English Cottage.

May God Bless You,  And So Regulate Your Mind As To Preserve

In You A Reverence For His Holy Word,  An Obedience To

The Commands Of Your Spiritual Pastor,  And A Respect For

All That Are Placed In Authority Over You!"

 

"Well,  It Is Pretty,  Too,  Is This Cottage," Said Mr.

Slick,  As We Strolled Back To The Inn,  "But The

Handsumestest Thing Is To Hear That Good Old Soul Talk

Dictionary That Way,  Aint It? How Nateral He Is! Guess

They Don't Often See Such A 'Postle As That In These